Leave the Table When Disrespect Is on the Menu: How to Recognize Toxic Relationships and Reclaim Your Self-Worth
Written By:
Oudney Patsika,
the Chief Editor at
Sona Headlines
Master Steward at
Leaders Mandate AND
Custodian of Vocation at
Pastors ToolBox
Hey, there is a moment in life when you must learn one of the hardest yet most empowering lessons: Leave the table when disrespect has become the menu.
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| Strength is not in how long you sit in a room that is breaking you. |
When we grew up, we were told that staying, enduring, and tolerating is a sign of strength. But hear me well: Strength is not in how long you sit in a room that is breaking you. Strength is the courage to stand up, push your chair back, and walk away.
The Silent Menu
Disrespect does not always come as loud as insults. Sometimes it is quiet, subtle, and hidden.
Disrespect is hidden in behaviors that make you question your worth. It is:
- When someone constantly dismisses your feelings.
- When someone minimizes your achievements.
- When someone jokes about your pain.
- When someone uses you emotionally, financially, and mentally.
- When someone only remembers you when they need something.
That's disrespect.
The Cost of Normalization
The danger with repeated disrespect is that if you stay too long, you start normalizing it. You start shrinking. You start doubting yourself.
Then you begin to believe that this is the best love you can receive or the best treatment that you deserve. This is the danger of staying too long in a place where you have been disrespected. You teach people how to treat you by what you accept.
Walking Away is Self-Respect
The moment you recognize disrespect, you are responsible for how long you continue to sit at that table. If the menu is disrespect, if every course served is draining, belittling, or humiliating, if you leave every conversation feeling smaller than you arrived... it is time to leave.
Walking away is not pride. Walking away is not anger. Walking away is not punishment. Walking away is self-respect. When you walk away from disrespect, you silently say:
- I'm not starving for love.
- I'm not desperate for attention.
- I know my worth.
- This table is too small for the greatness in me.
God Has a Better Table
And here is the truth: God will never allow you to walk away from something without introducing you to something better. Introducing you to a table where you are valued, where your voice matters, where your presence is appreciated and not tolerated.
When the menu is honor, peace, love, and clarity, that's where you belong. So today, evaluate your tables:
- Who are you dining with?
- What are they serving you?
- Are you being nourished or are you being poisoned?
And if the menu is disrespect, stand up, push your chair in, and stand up with dignity. Walk gracefully and never apologize for choosing yourself.
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