Chronicles Of Losing A Child - Real Life Experience - A Must Read!

The general expectation of life from time immemorial is that children will grow up to bury their parents. The parents themselves are expected to die in their twilight years of service and retirement. 

In principle, old people are expected to die first; presumably in their chronological order of birth. The firstborn dies first; the last born dies last. The same should apply to the children when they grow up; they will also be buried by their children in that same deemed pattern. 

Written by Tapiwa Zuze (Father) and Regina Zuze (Mother)
The cycle is expected to go on and on; from one generation to the next until the end of the world. However, the reality of life proffers a different playground altogether. There are no guaranteed patterns of comfort. Many times old people bury their young ones. 

The death of a child goes against the natural dictates of life. This is very tragic, to say the least; and no one, in their rightful natural sense can ever say I am now used to it. Biblically, this also tramples on Proverbs 13:22(a): “A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children”. Surely, if one is to leave an inheritance for one’s grandchildren; how then does death visit those young ones? 

Chronicles Of Losing A Child - Real Life Experience
Who then will be left to inherit the sweat of their grandparents? This is the mystery that only God, in his infinite wisdom, will one day reveal to us.

It is deeply frightening, disorienting and unsettling for anyone to be caught in this tight web of pains. Words like “unthinkable” and “unimaginable” are often used to provide a descriptive analysis of such; and many more. We recently lost our beautiful angel; “The Ambassador” Camilla Vimbanashe Zuze, just four days after the Lord had gifted us with our second born daughter. She came approximately 4 years 7 months after the birth of our firstborn daughter; “The Flying Captain” Paris Matipanyasha Zuze. Camilla breathed her first earthly oxygen on Monday 6 May 2019, at 18:06 hours. 

This is the same day that Prince Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor; the firstborn son of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle (The Duke and Duchess of Sussex), was born earlier during the day. Camilla’s birth coincided with a Royal Birth! But, two hours after her birth, she was put in the Neo-Natal Unit (NNU) at Baines Maternity Clinic, for her to get overnight paediatric attention since she seemed to struggle a bit with her breathe.

A series of events and tests followed later on during the week; which is a deep painful story for another day, and she was diagnosed to have Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia (CDH). She needed corrective surgery!! She fought through, in her incubator for four days; and God, in His infinite wisdom, decided to take her on Friday 10 May 2019, at approximately 17:00 hours. She went to be with the Lord right in our presence!! 

We held her in our hands after the paediatrician; Dr. Louisa Rudo Mudawarima-Chikara, had confirmed her dead!! OUR TEARDROPS were just running down our eyes and cheeks. Hey! Hey!

The pain and suffering of our family members, friends, colleagues, church-mates and workmates were palpable: like a writhing, ensnared animal trapped in a deep shaft, denied all the lighting and breathe. The heartaches and wails of all the people who received our phone calls will forever be etched in our memoirs. Such is life! Such is the reality that we have to face head-on, even as we grow up.

What can one possibly write about your lost child; an innocent infant who never got the chance even to wear her clothes at home? What can one possibly write about losing a dear beautiful daughter; who never got the chance come out of Baines Maternity Clinic alive; never got to play with her mom, dad, sister or dolls? The nightmare continues in our lives. One day, soon, we shall write the full story of how our dreams were shattered. 

We shall write the full account of how our dear angel went through horror for four days; how she was moved up and down the corridors of Harare for multilateral medical tests of the Blood, Chest X-Ray, Echocardiogram to determine heart functionality, Computerized Tomography (CT) Scan which detected the existence of Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia (CDH). We shall write the full story of how our angel fought a battle 1000 times bigger than her capacity and survived the onslaught for four days. 

We shall write the full story, clearly depicting how “The Ambassador” Camilla fought this enormous battle on 100% oxygen support and being fed through the drip. The story shall come out clearly on how, as responsible parents, we had to navigate through huge medical bills for the sake of our beloved daughter. She had a strong team of five specialist doctors attending to her abnormal condition; a frightening number considering her age. 

One day, in the near future; the full story of “The Ambassador” Camilla Vimbanashe Zuze shall be laid out for the public consumption.

A big thank you to everyone who stood with us before, during and after the bereavement. In particular, let me single out the following:

- Gogo S. Zuze; Gogo A. M. Saizi; Sekuru D. P. Zuze; and the Zuze and Saizi families
- Bishop (Apostle) Pride and Anna Sibiya, and the Glory Ministries family
- Dr. Simukayi Percy Machawira (Cardiovascular and Thoracic Surgeon)
- Dr. Jonah Kasule (Specialist Anaesthetist)
- Dr. Gwendoline Bvunzawabaya-Chimhini (Paediatrician)
- Dr. Mutsa Bwakura-Dangarembizi (Paediatrician)
- Dr. Louisa Rudo Mudawarima-Chikara (Paediatrician).
- Mr. Reggie Francis Saruchera (Administrator), Eng. Joseph Makonise (CEO); and the whole Air Zimbabwe family
- Baines Maternity Clinic, in particular, Sister Manyika and Sister Ndlovu from the Neo-Natal Unit (ICU Section)
- Nyaradzo Funeral Assurance Services (Herbert Chitepo Branch)
- First Mutual Health (99 Jason Avenue, Harare)
- Glen Forest Crematorium
- Colleagues, friends, relatives and neighbours

The journey ahead of us is a no-mans land. We will have to live with this tragic reality for the rest of our lives. Ummmm! We Call Upon God To Be With Us!

Source -

Tapiwa Zuze (Father) and Regina Zuze (Mother)

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