This Is Not Part Of The Deal - For all Real Men and Ladies!

For some time now, I have encountered a few ladies who came crying to me about some men's attitudes towards them in a love relationship. The complaints have been two folds:


1. Pressure to have sex with the boyfriend or fiance or lose the relationship.

2. Pressure to ascertain fertility by getting pregnant for the man first even though not married yet or lose the relationship.

This trend is highly worrisome.

To all the ladies, please hear me and well.

No man should mount pressure on you for anything. In true love there is no pressure. A man who truly loves you will respect your stand on "no-sex before marriage". A man doesn't have to feel loved except he gets to your panties or your "Jerusalem". There are many ways to make a man feel loved. Frequent effective communication, respect, outings, gifts, encouragements, support and most especially, prayers are enough to make a man feel loved.
This Is Not Part Of The Deal — For all Real Men and Ladies with Oudney Patsika
Anything more than these, then that guy is looking for something that you can't give him. Guys who mount pressure on their girlfriends/fiancées to have sex with them or threaten the relationship are those who could cheat on their spouses later on in marriage. Please beware.

Ladies, if a man is threatening you to get pregnant for him first before he will marry you is not husband material. Such men are those who, if there is a challenge with childbirth will either leave you alone to your fate, will have a child/children outside wedlock or will marry a second wife. As important as children are, however, we shouldn't twist the Bible for our selfish reasons. The primary reason why God instituted marriage was for companionship (friendship) see Genesis 2:18. Relationships or marriages where children are given paramount importance above the wife won't stand the test of time. Marriage is about both spouses involved, not the children. Please, ladies beware of such men.

Now to my men, women are treasures. They are queens and should be treated as such. Respect their decision if it's in accordance with the Bible. Premarital sex is not part of the deal. Sex doesn't make a man a strong person. It simply makes him undisciplined. Sex doesn't keep a man. A man who doesn't love a lady will still leave her. Commitment is what is highly required in a relationship, not sex.

Dear men, asking a lady to get pregnant for you first before you will marry her is sheer wickedness. And that act violates the divine rule of "no sex before marriage" set by God the initiator of marriage. In marriage, LOVE is more important than children and, the wife is the most important because by the time the children are all grown up they will all leave to found their own families and both spouses will be left together. 

What will happen to that couple if all between them were children only? 
Haven't you heard or seen couples who 5 or 10 years into marriage are already tired of each other? 

After all, the man has got the children he wanted so badly. There is nothing more to desire from his once lovely wife. Please don't marry this way. If children is your main focus in marriage, please don't marry, as you could have them from a "baby mama". Please don't turn your girlfriend or fiancée into a "baba mama" because she is not one.

Therefore, sex before marriage and pregnancy out of wedlock are not part of the deal because they are unacceptable, wicked, callous, selfish, immoral and sinful. 

True love is UNCONDITIONAL. 
Many thanks for reading, commenting, liking and sharing.

See you at the top!

Your friend,

Extracted From Coach Joshua's article by Oudney Patsika
This Is Not Part Of The Deal — For all Real Men and Ladies with Oudney Patsika

This Is Not Part Of The Deal — For all Real Men and Ladies with Oudney Patsika

This Is Not Part Of The Deal — For all Real Men and Ladies with Oudney Patsika


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One of the primary goals of Oudney Patsika is to use media to change the cultural narrative. He aims to impact today’s culture with more accurate, responsible, and positive media stories about Christianity and the Church. Get In Touch Today!
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